We call him Stef

We call him Stef.

It’s been 7 years of birthdays, anniversaries, first times, and many minutes of sheer heartache for me after losing Franscois, my husband, our papa, my support in life and someone who I had shared ten incredible years with. 

You know I can’t even sit here and explain to you the amount of pain my soul has felt in the past years but every day I woke up and I had to make the decision to live a life for our three kids. For Savannah, Taylor-Reece and Matthew. 

I chose to find reasons to smile, I chose to believe in their futures and myself too. 

I poured love into myself through exploring, through discovering my soul, through the power of God’s strength and through many MANY hours of therapy, self-awareness and prayer.

Earlier this year I went away with the kids (holiday video in progress) and while we were away something inside me just hit so hard. Perhaps it was all the family prayers of (please let Kristen find herself a good man) or perhaps my heart had finally found strength to open again to the idea of being loved and supported by someone God had been moulding for me.

Who too was on his own journey of strength and courage and healing.

We call him Stef.

A few months into the year I set my intention. I prayed for the details. And I walked that rickety bridge of trusting my path and doubting my path. (You know when you know you have to release all sense of safety and believe wholeheartedly in the road that was set before you – that scary but oh so rickety bridge…)

My cousin (a.k.a Chop) always said to me…one day someone is going to hold you so tight they will put all your pieces back together.

We call him Stef.

When my eyes met Mr du Preez that was that for me. When I looked at him from across the room and my soul went “there you are, we’ve been waiting for you”. There is nothing purer in this world than when the warmth of someone lights up your soul just by connecting to them.

I will never forget the feeling of losing my soul with Franscois and equally so, I don’t think I will ever forget the day it took its first breath again.

We call him Stef.